Friday, July 30, 2010

Friday Fever 50

Good morning friday!

Donald rumsfeld gave the president his daily briefing. He concluded by saying: "Yesterday 3 brazilian soldiers were killed."

"Oh no!" The president exclaimed. "That's terrible!"

His staff was stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the president sat, his head in his hands.

Finally, the president looked up and asked, "just how much is a brazillion?"

Pleasant friday everyone!

Regards from your witty most talented and amazing leader,
Felix

Friday, July 23, 2010

Friday Fever 49

Good morning friday!

A strong young man at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of one of the older workmen. After several minutes, one of the older workers had had enough.

"Why don't you put your money where your mouth is," he said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that building that you won't be able to wheel back."

"You're on, old man," the braggart replied. "Let's see what you got."

The old man reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles.

Then, nodding to the young man, he said, "Alright. Get in."

Pleasant friday everyone!

Regards from your witty most talented and exemplary leader,
Felix

Friday, July 16, 2010

Friday Fever 48

Good morning friday!

Saddam's doctors had a meeting with his 20 doubles. They said they had some good news and some bad news.

The good news was that Saddam had not been killed in the US bombing attack, so they still had their jobs.

The bad news was that Saddam had lost an arm.

Pleasant friday everyone!

Regards from your witty most talented and fantastic leader,
Felix

Friday, July 9, 2010

Friday Fever 47

Good evening friday!

A teacher, thief and a lawyer died and went to heaven.

When they got there, they were stopped by St. Peter, who then said to them, “Sorry, heaven’s crowding up, so you need to answer a question correctly, or else you can’t get in.”

He looked at the teacher, and asked her, “What was the name of the famous ocean-liner that sank after hitting an iceberg?”

“Oh, that’s easy,” the teacher replied, “the Titanic.”

So St. Peter let her into heaven.

Next, he turned to the thief. “How many people died on that ship?” St. Peter asked.

“Oooh, that’s tough, but I saw the movie, and it was 1, 500.”

St. Peter stepped away and the thief walked into heaven.

Finally, St. Peter turned to the lawyer. He simply said to him: “Name them.”

Pleasant friday and enjoy your weekends everyone!

Regards from your witty most talented and busy leader,
Felix

Friday, July 2, 2010

Friday Fever 46

Good morning friday!

Computer users are divided into three types: Novice, Intermediate and Expert

Novice users - people who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer.

Intermediate users - people who don't know how to fix their computer after they've just pressed a key that broke it.

Expert users - people who press the keys that break other people's computers.

Pleasant friday everyone!

Regards from your wisest most talented and capable leader,
Felix